Selfless or Self-Full? Rethinking Identity

Let’s start with a familiar feeling: the tug-of-war between helping others and taking care of ourselves. Have you ever felt torn between lending a hand to someone in need and taking a moment to recharge? Society often tells us that being selfless is noble, while prioritizing ourselves is selfish. But is it really that simple?

Let’s dive into this idea and rethink what it means to balance caring for others with caring for ourselves. We’ll explore how philosophy — especially Stoicism, Buddhism, and even modern psychology — offers wisdom to navigate this tricky dance of selflessness and self-care.

What Does It Mean to Be Selfless?

At first glance, being selfless sounds like a good thing. It means putting others first, being generous, and living with kindness. Think of people who volunteer their time, care for loved ones, or lend a listening ear. These acts of selflessness build stronger communities and bring meaning to our lives.

But here’s the catch: being too selfless can lead to burnout. Imagine pouring all your energy into helping others without ever stopping to refill your own cup. It’s like trying to give water from an empty well — you’ll run dry.

Philosopher Marcus Aurelius once wrote, “What is not good for the hive is not good for the bee.”…